Saturday, October 4, 2008

Solid Investment Advice - A Sign for Wall Street Execs

Investment tips for 2008 For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations in 2008:

1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. Will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.
2.) PolygramRecords, Warner Bros., and ZestaCrackers join and become: Poly, Warner Cracker.

3.) 3M will merge with Goodyear and become: MMMGood.

4.) ZippoMftg, AudiMotors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa.

5.) FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP.

6.) Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become: Fairwell Honeychild.

7.) Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: PouponPants.

8.) Knotts Berry Farm & National Organization of Women will become: Knott NOW!

And finally....

9.) Victoria 's Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new name: TittyTittyBangBang


Willy D said...

#6 FedUP say it all. Love the "Jump You Fuc*ers" picture. Should be in front of every house in foreclosure.

fasthair said...


#6 FedUP made me laugh. Just dealing with that company makes me FedUP!


FLHX_Dave said...

#6 and #9 are my picks for financial freedom. I think that the best bet for my money,(which I don't have) would be put into #9. I figure that with all the crap going on gun sales are going to skyrocket and T&A is always going to make money under any economic conditions.

Ann said...

If we had any money to invest, it would be in #9! That would be awesome!